I like tea

I have a microwave in my bedroom. Honestly, I don’t know why everyone doesn’t. I can’t imagine how I survived for so long without one. Now the reason I have a microwave in the bedroom is that when we moved in I already had a microwave, and this apartment came with one. So we had two. This apartment also has two floors. My bedroom is upstairs. The kitchen is downstairs.

I like tea.

I like tea a rather lot actually. Sadly I like tea in a way that tea snobs shudder at. If you’ve ever been to a dedicated tea shop, you have met a tea snob. They are the ones who explain how the pot should be rinsed with hot water first, and you use just EXACTLY this much tea… and the water should be cold before it goes into the kettle (preferably bottled mineral water from an alpine spring), and then heated to exactly this temperature, and then the tea is steeped for exactly this long and blah blah blah…

I make tea in the microwave.

I take the cup that I keep in my bedroom and I briefly rinse the remaining tea dregs out of it with the bathroom tap. Then I fill it up with water. From the tap. Sometimes it is cold water, sometimes it is warmish. I don’t particularly care. I put the cup of water in the microwave (in my bedroom), toss in a tea bag from the box I keep on top of the microwave, hit the quick start button three times to get a minute and a half, and I’m done.

When I say I’m done, sometimes I am actually done. As in I manage to forget during that minute and a half that I actually made tea. Generally I am reminded by the beeping, but I usually don’t run over to take it out right away because it is too hot. And then I forget. Sometimes I forget for so long that I forget that I’ve even made tea. At some point I will think to myself, “I want tea” and I will look for my cup. Desk? No. Bedside table? No. Bathroom sink? No.

I have learned that the inability to spot the cup generally means that it is in the microwave already.

Full of tea.

Sometimes the tea is still warm. Sometimes it is not. Either way my response is the same. Toss the teabag and drink it anyway.

I think you really really have to like tea to take a sip of a cup in which the teabag has been steeping for 12 hours and think, “That’ll do.”

Pansy tea snobs.



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